I am a 23-year-old girl and am always confused about the nature of my feelings towards girls since I was 10 years old.
This confusion is due to that my romantic and sexual feelings are not congruent. I have never imagined myself being in a sexual relationship with a girl, so I always concluded that I loved them as my best friends. But I always got butterflies in my stomach when I met them, I had this urge to touch them or hug them or cuddle them or talk to them 24/7. Why did it always hurt me when I know they're in love? Why didn't I feel those feelings with my real best friend whom I consider her my sister and I am sure internally that I love her as only my sister. but with those girls I always feel confused. I was internalized homophobe due to religious reasons until 6 months ago, I revealed my confusion to a friend of mine and she accepted my feelings and didn't care if I would be straight, bi-, or lesbian.
Can you develop romantic feelings towards girls without having this sexual lust to be with them? What were those girls for me, best friends or more than that? .