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Is it harder for men to come out?

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I have a lot of lesbian and bisexual friends and many of them have eventually come out to their family members. They managed to keep a good relationship with them even though this is very controversial in Kuwait and a lot of families here are still conservative. They don't tell their extended families but the direct family would know.

This has caused me to wonder if it's easier somehow to come out as a lesbian? Only two of my male friends came out and they don't have a good relationship with their families and they even lost a lot of friends, which is why I am not planning on coming out anytime soon either.

I have some female friends in the same situation as me so I know it's just as hard for them but I wonder sometimes if it's worse being gay than a lesbian in certain places. .

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  • 51-65_f_f_h1_f3
    Experience

    I can tell you from experience that it's VERY HARD to come out as a woman, it has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with family background and circumstances. I chose not to come out to my mother after many years questioning the possibilities. It was the hardest decision I ever had to take to remain secretive about this part of my life. I think your friends just deal with different situations and families. My mother would never have accepted me if I did come out.

    • 12-16_m_b_h3_f4
      Experience

      I am sure! I didn't mean to say that it was in any way easy, just if it made a difference in terms of perception. If it's more accepted based on gender. I agree now that it's different from one family to the other. I was basing this only on my own observations.

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  • 17-24_f_w_h2_f1
    Comment

    Sometimes I feel like the idea of lesbianism would be a bit easier to digest but I know that's not the case. It's equally difficult regardless of gender. I do agree with Butterfly. It really depends on the family and the situation the person is in.

    Reply to Edel
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  • 12-16_m_w_h4_f1
    Comment

    Hi,
    I think that it might be harder to accept gay men than lesbians as you could probably guess thats why a couple of countries(e.g Ghana, Singapore etc) only allow same sex relations with females and not males. However, i do think that lesbians, especially in the middle east, face a greater danger. Women here have fewer rights (in most middle eastern countries anyway) and have less power against their parents and family so that could be particularily dangerous if they're not accepted for who they are.

    Reply to Turing
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  • 17-24_m_b_h2_f4
    Comment

    i guess the process of coming out is the same regardless of gender , it's the aftermath that cuses either the drifting apart or further bonding between u and ur family , girls tend to be lovable and cute and all PLUS families feel they can protect their girls better , while with guys , parents get afraid itll turn into a challenge and that he would go out and have boyfriends and sleep with whatever and all , so they tend to "keep peace" by staying away , atleast spare themselves the "knowledge" :/ .

    Reply to pi-chan
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  • 17-24_f_w_h1_f1
    Comment

    i dun think its abt the Gender ,maybe n the middle east the Term Gay easier than a Lesbian
    some find it hard to accept a Gay being fucked n the Ass !! , and 4 'em a girl is jst playin till she is married
    but the Coming out itself is a very big step and depends if ur family is open minded enough to get it

    Reply to Mystique
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  • 51-65_m_f_h1_f4
    Comment

    i do not agree to talk with family..............it is my secret

    Reply to YOYO1000
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  • 25-34_f_w_h3_f4
    Comment

    I think life on gay men here is so much easier I mean you can move out any time or travel so it doesn't really matter if you came out you can live your life to the fullest but on the other hand I can't even go out with my friends just to hangout I'm a prisoner in my own home my mother tells me your either going to the your grave or to your future husbands house so yeah life is hard for a girl add to that shes a lesbian

    Reply to Mahoys
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