Hey guys ... I'm really really tired I feel like I can't struggle anymore
I'm a homosexual guy from Egypt 21 years old ... I came out to my mum 3 years ago and since then she has been taking me to doctors to cure and even forcing me to engage a girl or something ... I like who I am and I can't change it ... all I want is to live with someone I love with not judgement from others ... one day I wanna marry a guy not a girl ... I came out to some of my friends and some of them understand me and support me and others not so much they want me to change and it bothers me .... I got homosexual friends and all of that but I'm different all they think about is just sex ... I just wanna be loved and yes I'm ugly and w/e but it's what I really want .....
all I think about is committing suicide .... I am just tired I don't know what to do anymore
I got no dreams I got no present I got no future I got only emptiness , loneliness and sadness ..... I just can't survive in this community and I can't run away from it ... I cry every single night ... I'm writing this while I'm all teared up and trying to hold it .