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A Nightmare in Egypt

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Its becoming impossible to be gay in Egypt. Everyday people are being arrested and prosecuted. Now police can arrest people if they "only" suspect they are gay and force them to confess.
I can't date, I can't wear what I want, I can't fall in love, I can't exist. Is that it?! IS THAT IT?!! How am I supposed to live like this?!!! Someone please tell me. Specially that we are all afraid to even talk to each other in public. Someone talk to me .. Tell me there is hope.

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  • OMG I'm so sorry to hear how bad it is in Egypt right now. I wish I could change it somehow. That sounds truly scary. Sending you good thoughts and hugs. Stay strong & hang in there! I'm not in egypt but are there any egyptians out there with some advice on how you're handling it?

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  • 17-24_f_f_h3_f3
    Experience

    I bet to differ, I'm a lesbian in Egypt and I've been for a very long time. I've also had more than 1 girlfriend and been in an open relationship at some point. I'm not even so secretive about my sexuality and friends, co workers, neighbors and family have "suspected" me yet I was never "arrested". I'm so sorry if you simply don't know how to get your way being a homosexual in this country. You know it is not easy but it is not like what you're making it sound like. Keep in mind that you'd also get arrested anywhere in the world if you were caught committing any kind of public indecency regardless of your sexuality. Good luck though!

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  • 25-34_m_f_h4_f4
    Comment

    I am happy for you, but let me ellaborate on some facts.
    Since Dec 2014, 117 gay men were arrested, morals police are after gays and transexuals, not lesbians.
    I am a gender neutral, I get sexually harrased on daily basis.
    I was raped 3 times.
    I was photographed on the streets more times than I could count.
    My ex boyfriend got beat up badly cuz his friends found out he is gay.
    I was fired cuz my co-workers knew I am gay and threatned me.
    I never asked for anything except being left alone. Gays are not hurting anyone.

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  • I'm really sorry to hear that.
    But that brings my point back again, it is not easy here so get your way around it, in many not very homosexual friendly countries, not just Egypt, you gotta watch your steps, you don't go out provoking what you know isn't the norm. I'm sorry that it isn't the norm here and I wish it was more than you do but since it isn't I don't find it smart to kiss my gf in the middle of the street for example. There's no obligations for our sex lives/sexuality to get out in the open for everyone to know or see, it isn't like we need their approval. You know the drill in Egypt by now, so I believe its in your best interest to start acting in a more acceptable way to the society you live within. That doesn't mean I like this but I think your safety should be more important than your sexuality.

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  • I think Tim knows that he needs to be careful, but he's coming to us in this LGBT space to let out his frustrations and express the trauma that's happened to him, and he can't let this out in public or other spaces. I just want him to feel like he's getting support, love, and understanding rather than "What did you expect? Do better!" Also i think it's important to acknowledge that for some people, because of the way they look no matter how hard they try, fucked up people are gonna react to them with violence whereas others are more able to hide/be closeted and we shouldn't blame the victim but the society.

    • 25-34_m_f_h4_f4
      Comment

      Thank you femmeprincess

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    • Ok, I'll support someone emotionally when they're not trying to make it look like they're running after every single person they suspect is gay. Sorry but get real, if you had it bad then I'm really sorry but start acting like you're expected to act in a close minded society. I wish it was easier and more simple but sorry, it isn't. Don't mess up and blame everything else around you. Take responsibility, control yourself you're an adult you sure can and avoid those you think might cause you troubles and more importantly, your sexuality is a private thing why as homosexual people do we need to declare to the whole world that we are homosexuals? Do straight people do that? Its PRIVATE means only those you care about should know and doesn't mean random people in the street or your co workers must as well. Simply be professional at work. and again remember that any public act of indecency would be met with consequences in Egypt or not. So if you know people won't accept something, I'm really sorry to say that but do not do it for your own good. I know this sounds a bit harsh but I'm just trying to point out that we do not live in San Fransisco, you know how it is in Egypt so start going around it and avoid whatever could put you at risk. Sorry again.

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    • I hear where you're coming from but at the same time saying things like "Don't mess up and blame everything else around you. Take responsibility, control yourself" isn't very compassionate, I feel like Tim is doing the best he can and is getting attacked anyway and feeling scared and alone.The least we can do is offer him some compassion. Anyway I know it's not my place to talk because I'm not experiencing what you're all experiencing, but I just see a hurt voice and it pains me to see other queer people not respond with more sympathy.

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  • 25-34_m_f_h4_f4
    Comment

    OMG why are you obssesed with public indecency?!!! Who asked for it?!!! Please read my note again, I never wanted to expose my sexual identity, I wanna feel normal and secure about my "gender" identity. About my sexuality, all I want is to be normal, and be able to log on my Grindr account and not talk to an undercover officer (109 gays were ambushed and arrested like this). I never asked to make out on the street, I want a life as a queer, not as a gay, BIG difference. So please stop giving totally irrelevant advices.

    • 17-24_f_f_h3_f3
      Comment

      Well, there's no way you're acting totally normal for the place you're living in yet all those people are after you..just saying..

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  • 25-34_m_f_h4_f4
    Comment

    Define normal? Norm? Status quo? What is normal? What is an acceptable gender identity??

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  • Ok, need I remind you that the 109 gays that were ambushed into getting arrested weren't ambushed while studying for their finals? They were performing some form of either prostitution or public indecency in a public bathroom that was used solely for this purpose. Am I with them being ambushed like that for some trash talk show to get some attention? No, I'm totally not. But do I fool myself into believing that what they were doing was normal? Nope, I'm not. Tell me are you planning to go have sex in a public bathroom? I don't think you are. So whats the problem here? They'd have been arrested in USA, Europe or Australia for the same act not only Egypt. Now if you and your bf were at your own place doing whatever gay/queer thing you want to do and the police somehow found out and came to your own place and arrested you now that would have been a total violation of your privacy and human rights whether you were gay or straight, was what you doing with your bf in your home normal? Yes, it was. So in short, don't mix facts up. I'm quite sure if you treat your sexuality like it should be treated which is sacred and private, no one would know or bother you. I've been a homosexual just like you are in the very same country and my gf and I even worked in the same place, neither of us experienced any of the things you had simply because we knew we where we live and we didn't feel the need to bring our sexuality to our work place either as it would've been unprofessional if being a homosexual isn't accepted in my work place which is unfair of course but thats where we live. I don't decide whats normal and what isn't because what you want to be normal is same as what me and every other homosexual person in Egypt would want too but unfortunately the majority of our society is what decides.

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  • 17-24_f_f_h1_f1
    Comment

    hi Tim....sorry for all ur trouble...but i feel that i must post abt the gays supposedly got arrested according to ur statement were allllll exonerated http://www.elwatannews.com/news/details/638773 so there is no need to victimize things.....but whether they were guilty or not why r u even comparing other respectable gay guys with those guys that were doing it in public like animals which is unhealthy and could lead to stds and worse ? u should not put urself in this category at all

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  • Also can I just say that as lesbian/queer/bi women we can never really know what it's like in the shoes of a gay man? I think society can be even harsher to men who don't constantly prove that they're living "the norm" of masculinity than it is to women. It's a huge amount of pressure on them.

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  • 25-34_f_f_h1_f2
    Comment

    I am so sorry for all you had to face and to feel. I'm a queer from Egypt too and i agree wiz u it's so homophobic society. Since it considered as a patriarchal male society, it oppress gays more than lesbians in addition to the religious forbiddance of homosexuality specially gays. We have to face all kinds of homo phobia through our life and it become more dangerous if ur homo identity become easy to discover by the society so take care of ur self, but the most important thing is to never give up or feel guilt or as a victim but have hope in safely and gradually building ur life the way u like.

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  • 25-34_f_f_h1_f2
    Comment

    I am so sorry for all you had to face and to feel. I'm a queer from Egypt too and i agree wiz u it's so homophobic society. Since it considered as a patriarchal male society, it oppress gays more than lesbians in addition to the religious forbiddance of homosexuality specially gays. We have to face all kinds of homo phobia through our life and it become more dangerous if ur homo identity become easy to discover by the society so take care of ur self, but the most important thing is to never give up or feel guilt or as a victim but have hope in safely and gradually building ur life the way u like.

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
    Comment

    I know what you mean I am gay guy and from Egypt It's so hard

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