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I'm muslim, I wear hijab and I like girls so what?

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Hi everyone this is my first post ever on this site and I thought of sharing this thought with you and especially lesbians or bi girls.

Well first of all, I wanna know if there are lesbians or bi girls who are Muslims and wear hijab because I wanna know if someone is going through the same situation I'm in and how do they deal with it?

Well so let me start with that I never understood why my Arabic lesbian friends not even the American or European ones but the Arabic Muslim lesbian friends that I have.
when they first see my profile picture they're like almost shocked knowing that I'm actually wearing hijab or they would be like "so your family is forcing you to wear it ...when will you take it off...do u ever think of taking it off"

Actually that doesn't bother me much I get to reply them but it keeps me thinking of all the lesbian women I could've had a chance with but just because I'm wearing hijab they might think of me as closed minded Muslim.

Besides i know homosexuals who believe that religion and homosexuality are contradictions like you can't live with both in your heart.

Let me tell you that I can't imagine myself without hijab it became a part of my identity just as my beliefs and my homosexuality are. and I don't see any contradiction with believing in your religion and being a homosexual. It seems like most of the arab lesbians I know are non believers like they're Muslims only in the papers but they aren't believers.
My question is why some lesbians or homosexuals in general see that you have to sacrifice one thing for the other so you can live? Why can't you live with both as parts of who you are? And let me tell you a personal thought of mine that one can't follow EVERY rule of their religion because of the simple fact that we are humans. And If religions are meant of be perfect then we are not. That's probably why I'll never let go of my beliefs.

So yeah that's it and I hope you get the point I'm trying to clarify and
Thanks for reading xx .

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  • 17-24_f_f_h3_f3
    Experience

    Hi
    I fail to see any conflict between religion and sexual orientation Most of us here are Muslims and gay, so what ? You dress the way you feel proper and comfortable and it shouldn't in any way conflict with who you fall in love with. I knew couple of girls that wore hijab and were bi afaik. Anyway, I just don't see any rules that say be atheist in order to be gay At any rate, you'll find more than 1 useful discussions on this forum about religion and homosexuality if you're interested.

    Reply to Delusions
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  • 17-24_f_w_h3_f2
    Comment

    Hi thanks for your reply I'm glad that there are people who can keep both of their religion and sexual orientation cause I happen to know people who don't and it kinda annoyed me cause I thought everyone of LGBTQ community are like that, but your comment proved I'm wrong. I'll check the religion related discussions here I'm sure they're gonna be useful to me.

    Reply to ninaselena
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  • Its common concept for some people to see us like that, lol, I was once questioned on how come do I pray if I like girls!! its just easier to ignore such mentalities because if they were intelligent enough such assumptions or questions shouldn't be formed at all.

    You may find this topic interesting
    https://ahwaa.org/topics/661

    Reply to Delusions
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  • 17-24_f_w_h1_f4
    Comment

    Hey, same here. I'm a Muslim queer. A lot of people ask me how can you be gay and Muslim at the same time? Yes, it's possible to be queer and Muslim.
    I'll tell you one thing my favorite feminist activist said "People think Islam and queerness are contradictory, but both are deeply woven into the fabric of who I am."

    • 17-24_f_w_h3_f2
      Comment

      Thanks for posting your comment it's nice to know that i'm not the only one. This is a great quote I'll add it to my favorites for sure

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  • 17-24_f_w_h3_f2
    Comment

    Thanks for posting your comment it's nice to know that i'm not the only one. This is a great quote I'll add it to my favorites for sure

    Reply to ninaselena
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  • 17-24_f_w_h1_f3
    Comment

    "it keeps me thinking of all the lesbian women I could've had a chance with but just because I'm wearing hijab they might think of me as closed minded Muslim" I feel exactlyy the same actually.. :SS

    Reply to Adena11
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  • Why is this such a dilemma, ladies ?
    If you wear your Hijab willingly then whoever you date must understand that and respect that. If someone wants you in a certain way or wants you to look a certain way that does not make you comfortable then it will simply lead to unhealthy relationship results in the end. On the other hand if your Hijab doesn't make you feel comfortable, if you didn't wear it willingly, then sorry but that hypocrisy part is on you not others.

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  • 17-24_f_w_h2_f4
    Comment

    I have to admit that I would never hit on a girl who's wearing hijab. Too afraid of falling on a close minded person and a violent rejection. I remember this time when a girl who was wearing hijab kept looking deeply at me,and even if I returned the looks,it was clear in my mind that she couldn't be anything else than straight. Well i realise now how wrong I was.

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  • 25-34_f_w_h2_f1
    Comment

    Im wearing Hijab too , actually im facing the same problem either in real life or on social media; when i fell in love with a girl i fail to attract her attention since my physical appearance doesn't reflect my sexual orientation ( most lesbians think that a "lesbian" cannot and must not wear hijeb), at least this is what happens with me when i meet lesbians on facebook. Actually i used to attract girls with my boyish style haircut and clothing, but after wearing hijab things aren't like they used to be, i no more can attract girls attention in streets, malls or in wedding parties as i used to do, im just using facebook to meet new girls and then i start to explain HOW IT COMES TO BE " A LESBIAN" AND "WEARING HIJAB" TOO. Girls you must not discuss this ISSUE from a religious perspective It is not a matter of RELIGION but it is concerning the way ""Most Lesbians"" (around the world) think ! They think that by being GAY you are challenging (not God) but social and religious values so according to them if you obey and wear hijab you must deny your sexual orientations too.

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  • 17-24_f_w_h1_f4
    Comment

    Okay so I used to be a Muslim and now I am not and I still wear hijab because of the pressure. People just tend to associate hijab with religiousness and "purity" and that homosexuality is "impure" and kind of hated by religion. I think that's how people put it.

    Reply to skyestone
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  • 25-34_f_w_h2_f3
    Comment

    Yeah I used to be Muslim too and I don't wear hijab anymore. Why not be a hijabi muslim and gay? In terms of culture, we see all kinds of hijabis drinking and going to clubs and having straight sex. Who cares? Do what you want.

    Reply to Cuddles
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  • 25-34_f_w_h1_f3
    Comment

    Well, I used to be a Muslim and I wore hijab, but that's not the case anymore! I'm sorry, but I can't reconcile religion (any religion, not just Islam) and homosexuality, mainly because these religions rejected the concept of homosexuality and queerness in general. So, how can you follow something that in essence says you are wrong, your choices are wrong and you don't deserve to exist! If most of you can reconcile both, then you are lucky I guess. But, what exactly is being a Muslim or a christian mean? Doesn't that imply following the teaching of that religion? The teachings of these religions tell you not to drink, have premarital sex (straight, of course) and not be homosexual. Am I wrong? So, that's why some of us find it strange when they meet gay people who are actually religious. I'm not saying it's wrong, and it doesn't affect my attraction to any girl or my opinion of her, because I believe that religion and spirituality are very personal choices that no one has any right to judge. So, if you're comfortable being religious and gay, that's good. If you aren't, then no one has the right to judge you as well.

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  • Hi! I agree with a lot of what has been said in this thread! Maybe I have a very idealistic view because I am American, but I feel that soon there will be a push for Islamic leaders, and also among Muslims, to accept homosexuality as normal and halal. As for a lesbian hijabi, I say rock on and keep searching for a woman who will be open-minded enough to love you and your hijab.

    Thoughts?

    Reply to elsayedtheamerican
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  • 17-24_f_w_h3_f2
    Comment

    I can't remember when I posted this topic but I'm no longer a muslim, I've been an atheist for months now but I still have my hijab on because my parents won't let me take it off, when I move from here I will take it off of course. I just wanna say that lgbtq hijabis deserve love and respect just like everyone else in the lgbtq community. I don't see anything wrong with holding on to your beliefs and expressing who you are at the same time, I've met amazing muslim lgbt people who are in beautiful relationships, so I hope you understand that your beliefs don't make you less valid.

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    Anonymous
    Comment

    i am a muslim and i wear the hijab ! and i find it hard to even take a risk and talk to a girl to ask her out bc people don't seem to accept it and that makes it har for me to accept myself

    Reply to Anonymous
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  • 17-24_f_f_h1_f2
    Comment

    it takes time my friend, accepting yourself takes some time just don't wait for people to be okay with that bcz they will never be.

    Reply to ninaa
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  • 35-50_f_f_h1_f3
    Comment

    I feel so sad to hear that some of you doesnot belong to a religion anymore; no offense akeed but it just hurted me deep inside.
    I am Muslim and I used to wear hegab.. I took it off even before discovering that iam bisexual
    We are all humans and we all have a do mistakes and God is there just to love and forgive us
    I think that it's ok to be a Gay or a Bi and still belive in God.
    Again no offend to anyone but I want u all to be happy and to live peaceful with your self by any means.

    • I understand what you mean. I hope this makes sense but for me I feel that the closer I get to God, the further away I am from religion. Not in that I am drifting from Islam, but I am drifting from the culture associated with Islam. It's a struggle for me and I'm sure it's not easy for anyone but I definitely feel that religion gives me happiness and purpose. It isn't that way for everyone though and I want to respect that. But I do agree that your sexuality does not in any way take away from your ability to be religious.

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    • 35-50_f_f_h3_f2
      Comment

      I hear you and recognize your pain. I commend you for having the courage to tell that. You are not alone in this at all. I, too, know what it’s like to be 40-year-old Muslim girl attracted to other women and wearing hijab too

      My dear ...., Being queer and Muslim is not a disease. It’s between you and Allah

      i know It’s not easy to be in communities that force you to hide who you are and your struggles. It is incredibly painful but I want to emphasize that you are fully human, normal, worthy of love, respect, dignity, and that you have every right to be happy and the right to choose your soulmate or your life partner ...

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  • 25-34_f_w_h2_f1
    Comment

    Hi , I'am a veiled woman, I totally agree with you , I'm lesbian and all what I hear from time to time is how it happens to be lesbian and wearing hijab !!

    at the same time,you can't imagine how many times I was asked this stupid question, and as well, you cannot by any means imagine how it is hard to find a girlfriend when being veiled, I meet a lot of girls tens
    of them every single day, for sure there are some lesbians among them but no one of them cares or even
    pays attention they do not even think that I'am lesbian just because I'am wearing hijeb,

    Reply to jessyart
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  • 12-16_f_w_h1_f1
    Comment

    Also a hijab-wearing muslim here lol, but I do see your point. Stereotypes are the problem. This is a very interesting discussion,

    Reply to KaraT
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  • 17-24_f_w_h2_f4
    Comment

    am one too! and yeah I used to struggle with the same ideas too, I always wondered if there are people who would relate to this.. Right now, I dont really overthink it anymore, it's is what it is. A person is a combination of many things, and it just happens that those things are being Muslim and lgbt, soooo ..

    • Nicely put. We can't choose to be LGBT, but we can choose to still lead lives that align with our values. For me, I value being Muslim and having faith in a higher being (for me, that higher being is God/Allah SWT). I'm here, I'm queer, and I'm MUSLIM ! There's so many different parts of who I am. I am a teacher, a son, a brother, a hard worker etc...

      Especially to people who want to give me "advice"... I say frame it positively. Don't tell me I can't be a Muslim because I'm gay...encourage me to pray. Don't tell me I'm not a good enough teacher....show me how I can do better for my students.

      you guys!

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    • 17-24_f_w_h2_f4
      Comment

      thank you for taking the time to reply!

      And I really hope people will be more considerate and open minded. It would be better if everyone had such a mind set and, just as you said, expressed themselves positively! x)

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  • Default-avatar
    Comment

    Hi ninaselena and others, i am a undergraduate doing some research for my dissertation project for my final year and i am interested in researching people wearing the headscarf, especially those in the LGBTQ. if you would like to contact me on this email (habbiba_98@hotmail.co.uk ) and answer a few questions, only if your comfortable to do so. It is more than possible to keep yourself anonymous in my research. This could be a larger platform to share your beliefs as well as contributing to my research study. thank you for your time, enjoy your day. Habbiba

    Reply to Habbibaak
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