I was a bit of a late bloomer coming out at 21 years of age and looking back, coming out has been the hardest thing I've done till now. For me, it didn't end at accepting my homosexuality and saying that I was gay out loud. It was a journey that lasted about three years.
Like I didn't have enough issues, I had to be gay as well. There was so much shame that I had to overcome, that kept being reinforced by continued rejection and a low self-esteem that prevented me from doing what was good for me. I formed a dependence on the first person that was like me and tearing myself away from the negativity that entire situation created was an absolute nightmare.
Throughout the entire thing, I went from being overwhelmed, to being idealistic, to being humbled and now my sexual identity really doesn't mean much to me. Sure my heart beats faster whenever I casually mention my girlfriend or that I'm gay for the first time, but over all it's just one fact about me. I've finally accepted myself and all that comes along with being me.
Now, I'm exploring other parts of myself. I'm surprisingly ambitious. I'm a bitch sometimes and I'm so cute. Like, legit cute, you know what I'm saying? I don't care whether I have gay friends or not. People are people and I want to be surrounded by those who care about me and are amazing, whatever their sexuality.
There's so much to us than being gay (or bi, trans etc), but that one little thing defines so much of our life because of where we live that we lose ourselves in how we label our sexuality and we forget that there's more to us than that. We forget that that will not be the only bad thing to happen, that good things can come out of this weird life we're stuck in.
But that's my journey. Whether you've recently come out or have been out for a while, how have you changed? How far have you come?