I think it's safe to assume that most of us here are not out or planning to come out either to family or in public. Some have chosen to come out to a few trusted friends and of course partners, but that otherwise our sexuality is a massive secret. It's as if we have to go through the real world as an undercover homosexual and hope that no one blows that cover for fear for our safety or jobs or family.
Sometimes I wish the closet had a lock so that we can remain comfortably inside with the partner of our choosing instead of constantly having to justify ourselves or our feelings to the world.
Other times I wonder if life is better and more comfortable outside of the closet because you never have to be paralyzed by paranoia and fear of anyone finding out.
I also wonder if it's possible to experience both lives at the same time but I guess once enough people know of your identity it's hard to keep their mouths shut about it unless they share the same secret. .