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A Lesbian agnostic woman in a Muslim country

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So it started first as me being a feminist.. of course there had to be a trigger. Sexual harassment, childhood molestation, being told that I have to cover up as if I am a piece of meat or some sort of candy, physical abuse because simply it is ok for your dad/brother/ husband to beat you up.. etc. From there, I found the basis of all sources of evil.. religion.
Some might disagree and argue that it's the people's fault and they interpret it wrong, but the whole point is.. did all 90% of religious people got their religion wrong and only the 10% got it right or interpret it correctly?
Why would women suffer because God created a religion in which he knew most of people will interpret it wrong?

Anyway..

There goes... being a feminist then.. agnostic
Meanwhile, I have always liked girls.. since I was 10. yes, I went through all kinds of denial.
Praying: check + no effect
Shutting down all emotions: check + no effect
Getting a boyfriend: check + no effect
Have sex with a guy or in other more common word "3att" : check + awkward + ew + no effect

Not having any friends (girl- friends): check + no effect -- I ended up liking girls more!
Moving on, I find myself today with all these categories.. basically going against every single norm this society is setting.
Always in endless struggles fighting, sensibly arguing and getting hate from all kinds of people for all these reasons mentioned in the title and where does it end?

Will I ever see change before I die?

Will I ever get to see any form of freedom or support from my parents or old friends?

Needing an answer.. .

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