Fascinating article about a married (to a woman) gay religious man
First of all, disclaimer: I am not a religious man, let alone a morman, like the man in the following article. However, I have made a promise to myself to learn more about religious people, and to stop judging them as I have done in the past.
So, as I read the article, I tried to remain as open-minded as possible, and to listen to his message, his truth, as he has presented it to me.
Here is the link:
http://gawker.com/5917022/im-a-gay-mormon-whos-been-happily-married-for-10-years
I'm still processing my thoughts on it actually, but I'm very curious as to how other people will view it. So if the topic interests you, please click the link and then leave some thoughts here (I'll do the same, once I can articulate them!) .
pi-chan
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he's good XD . i love the part where he said " I am gay, any lifestyle I choose is technically a "gay lifestyle" " , and him not judging others' lifestyles is great too .
but thats ONE religious person trying , u have MILLIONS here in the middle east alone , dunno rly , but from my point of view we r far from coming to "truce" with the religious folks , god's servants ,truth bla-bla or whatever they call themselves nowadays
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Sign UpButterfly
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He spent all his life suppressing his sexuality and expects us to believe that he was living in bliss all these years. I want to believe him but something is off about this story. Either I'm confused or he is.
Edel
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I think as long as he's happy, even if it's just self-convinced happy, it's all that matters to him right now. I would support his decision because of his attitude towards those who would choose a different path than his. You see, I had a friend who was bi and then she made the same decision he made, because of religion. Thing was she would say that she wouldn't judge the decision others would make but that she wouldn't support it, and we're all free to make our own choice and there really isn't any judgement involved because it's her personal decision. The difference between that guy in the article and my ex-friend was that I felt very much judged because she was judging every time I had to censor myself before I said anything 'gay' and knowing that I wouldn't be able to talk to her about any partner I may have. So no matter how that man has shaped his life, he claims to be happy and is spreading the message of love instead of rejection and intolerance towards those who don't share his beliefs.
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Sign UpArchipelago
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I liked that 'any lifestyle I choose is technically a "gay lifestyle"' part too :)
If you click on the link at the bottom of that page, you can go to his blog and there's a video of him and his wife talking about how they are (positively) overwhelmed by the responses they've received so far, and it has barely been 24 hours!
Anyway, I've had some time to think about what I wanted to say now.
I felt both happy and sad after reading this article: happy that this man has found a way to reconcile his faith with his sexual orientation; sad that he has chosen to not follow his natural instincts; happy that he doesn't expect ALL religious people with same-sex attractions to follow his example; sad that he will probably come under a lot of attack from both the mormon and gay communities.
Josh (the author of the article) states that "you are reading the words of a real live person who is telling the truth"....and I believe him. I believe that this is his truth, and I support him for coming out and sharing his truth with the world.
From my point of view, there is not one "correct" way to be gay (no more than there is a "correct" way to be staight). It seems that this intelligent man has made decisions that he feels are the best for him and his family, so for that I support him :) True, I haven't - wouldn't - made this choice for myself, but I support his right to do so for him.
Brining this back to where we are in the world, I'd like to offer my love and support to all religious people here in the Middle East who have same sex attractions. I don't share the same path as you, but I wish you all the best in navigating that path :D
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Oh Lordy,
Well, turns out that the man who wrote that post is actually an Ex-Gay "Reparative Therapist" *siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh*
http://www.joemygod.blogspot.com/2012/06/exposed-opposite-married-gay-mormon-is.html
So, how does this change how I view him? Well, I believe that what he wrote he actually believes, i.e. he knows he is gay but has chosen to live in a heterosexual relationship because he believes it is the best way for him.....
BUT I ALSO FEEL ANNOYED because while I support his right to live his life the way he sees fit, the fact that he is _paid_ to treat teenagers who have (I'm assuming) come to him because of parental or other pressure because they are not comfortable with the teenager's sexuality - _not_ because the teenager WANTS it (if they do want to change, that's a different story) -....that, to me, is absolutely vile.
....I am sure that there are other people in the world who have made a choice like that man, and I will support them too as long as they are not participating in ex-gay therapy. Doh! *feels stupid*
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